and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
