NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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