You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize