I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
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