Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
