He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
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The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
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You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
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