I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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