Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
