I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
