does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
this will be a night to untag.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize
