Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I think people are normalizing furries
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize