No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
PS: I just woke up from my shower
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
