First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Randomize
