Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
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