if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
