at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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