i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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