there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
