Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
