dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
