actually, I'm a sock model
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
