I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
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Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
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Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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