wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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