i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
