right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
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