i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Randomize
