youre lurking in front of me
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
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