I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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