I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
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I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
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The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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