D3 body, D1 cock
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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