Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
