well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
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