Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
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