So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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