you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
i drank out of a bidet.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Pooping to opera.
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