I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
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