i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Randomize
