Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize