I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize