She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
