I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Randomize