I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
These 27 C*ck Blocks Are Savage AF
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you