remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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