Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Randomize
