we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
It's rum buckets o'clock
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
