She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
