You're completely useless in the revolution.
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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