I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
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