I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
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