Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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